“The RoseBouquet”

You may think you could never have a good friendship with authority figures, but Esther’s story proves that wrong. She was an orphan, raised by her older cousin Mordecai, in a foreign land, where they were captives brought in from Israel. Hadassah, known as Esther in this story, grew up respecting and admiring her father figure, Mordecai.

It seems they had a close and loving relationship, for when Esther was swooped up in a royal raid of all the beautiful young maidens in the land to live in the king’s harem, Mordecai paced back and forth just outside the royal gates, to watch for any news of Esther.

In the harem, Esther quickly won the favour of Hegai, the eunuch in charge. He saw to it that she got extra beauty treatments and special food. In fact, each girl had to go through a twelve month beauty program before she even was taken to the king for the first time. Esther obediently cooperated and did as Hegai advised.

When each girl’s turn came, she was allowed to take along to the king whatever she wanted. I suppose some took the equivalent of their favourite teddy bear, or wore a perfume they were sure would WOW the king, or some good luck jewelry. Esther took only what Hegai advised.

She did please King Xerxes. A lot. After that one night stand, she was crowned queen and moved to his concubines’ harem. Here she was under the care of another eunuch, Shaashgaz.

Lest we think that getting along with all these authority figures shows Esther to be weak and pliable we need to read the rest of her story in the Bible.

Sitting at the king’s gate, Mordecai over-heard a plot of the guards to overthrow the king. He got word to Queen Esther who reported it to the king. The king investigated it and disposed of the guards, but forgot to give credit where due.

When the wicked Haman tricked the king into signing an edict that would allow for the slaughter of all Jews on a certain date Mordecai sat in sackcloth and ashes by the gate, so Esther sent out clothes and food to him.

Mordecai asked Esther to speak to the king. Esther insisted on three days of intensive prayer first, and requested that all the other Jews in Susa should join in this fast too. Then she went to the King with a banquet invitation for him and also Haman. She invited them to a second banquet, where she perceived the timing to be right, and told her husband, the King, of Haman’s plot to destroy all her people. Esther believed in action, but only when the stage was set and the timing just right. Even in her plea she had the respect of her husband/king.

We in turn, respect Esther for her humility, grace and discernment. Yet, becoming just like her may seem impossible to us. It shouldn’t be, unless we try to be all that in our own strength and nature.

Humility is gained by understanding the awesome sovereignty of God, and how small and dependent we are on His grace. Grace become part of our character when we forgive others as readily as we know God has forgiven us. Discernment grows in us as we learn to seek God’s view and wisdom on every issue and with every person we meet. We just become more Christ-like - or, we have humility, grace and discernment just like Esther.

Yes, it is possible to have a unique type of friendship with the authority figures in our lives.

[Note: if you missed any articles in this series of article on Friendships in the Bible, and want to read them, you'll find them all linked from this index which is about Friendship]

On Saturday I left all my work lie right where it was, and I attended workshops all-day MHSS day at Bethany Manor.

In the morning Esther Patkau taught how to write one’s Memoirs and then, how to write a good obituary.

I had assumed lunch would be served, but we were on our own for that. Fortunately, Maria Bartel, the lady sitting beside me was eager to talk with me, and invited me to the dining hall where she normally eats her meals, for she is a resident of this large retirement community. I followed her as she trudged along with her walker.

In a large, spacious and lovely dining room, we sat to eat with a couple whom I had never met before, but who are also related to me. I don’t have my genealogy book right here, but I believe Peter Friesen, like Maria, is a second cousin of my mother’s. Anyway, it was a delightful lunch. Lovely food, served graciously by friendly waitresses.

For the afternoon workshop we had been promised that if we brought a laptop, we would get a free database loaded up with over 1 million names. It is called GRANDMA. (It stands for: Genealogical Registry And Database of Mennonite Ancestry). It normally costs $75 with a registered copy of the Brother’s Keeper software, so that offer was a good deal.

A cousin has given me the older versions 4 and 5, but this was the latest, version 6.

Last week Jondalar had helped me prepare a laptop that had been given to me a couple of years ago. I was looking forward to getting this gift. Unfortunately, we had not loaded all the drivers, so while it worked, (hallelujah!) it didn’t recognize the USB stick when it was inserted. My friend Anna said she’d bring me a copy next time she comes into the city, so not all is lost, but I have to be satisfied for now with the smaller database that I already had.

While my American friends were celebrating Presidents Day yesterday, three provinces of Canada were celebrating a new holiday called “Family Day.” Yes, Saskatchewan was one of them. (Alberta and Ontario are the other two; Manitoba celebrates Louis Riel Day, and Prince Edward Island celebrates Islander Day). It converges with Valentine’s Day to give everyone a bit of a shove for showing love to those near and dear to you.

In my case, my friend Shannon invited me over yesterday for supper, so we celebrated friendship. Otherwise I spent the day working at home, and had a fairly productive day. I even got some bread-baking and mending done over my noon hour. Beyond that I got as much done as I would have at the office.

Sure, rub it in, I’m a workaholic. But I knew that work had to get done, and I didn’t mind doing it.

Incidentally, I have added the photos from weekend before last when
Ernie Came to help with my stairwell.

Have you noticed how many websites now show little boxes with videos? What do you think of them?

It looks like a trend that is here to stay, although many of us still have to learn how to get along with it. Sometimes if we have older computers or a lowly dial-up even the smallest and shortest video is a challenge to watch.

You need a lot of extra RAM memory so that the video can load before it starts, or it will be jerky while it stops to buffer or load the next little segment. You also need the right kind of codecs and software on your computer to see and hear them well.

I’ve asked Jondalar to start teaching me how to create videos this week, so I can add some to my sites, but just to make sure I didn’t have to start at ground zero, I took time yesterday to research a bit and see what it takes.

It seems a good camera, and then good software for editing the film, and more software to compress the files so they aren’t so huge - these are the main ingredients. It turns out that some of the software is free and ready to install.

I’m not sure I want to start with movies of people. I was thinking more in the line of animated how-to lessons, but it will be interesting to see how this develops. I may have more to tell you next week.

There is an end in sight for my series of articles on friendships in the Bible and what we can learn from them. Today’s is about a young king who sought the advice of his rebel friends. There will be only 6 or 7 more and then that will be finished.

I’m planning to start a Bible study on Giving next, but that will generate articles for another site. So I got to thinking yesterday about the Ruthe’s Roses section in the RoseBouquet.

Well, I’ve daydreamed sometimes about having a special weekend retreat to which I would invite my dearest friends and I would ask them to help me analyze and critique my novel and how I can improve it, or the website to market it better. I cannot yet afford to fly in my friends or to reserve a resort for such a retreat, so I’m thinking I’m going to use that spot for a virtual retreat. I’ll try to make it fun, and do it in short bites, and even offer prizes to those who participate. Tangible prizes that I put in the mail to you, not just downloads.

That will allow me to get back to the main purpose of this RoseBouquet, and my site, Ruthes-SecretRoses.com and maybe I’ll really start selling copies of my novel!

You haven’t a clue what my book is about? - Well, the first 14 chapters are available on the site, Ready to Read You have a few weeks to get a head start.

Rehoboam succeeded his father Solomon as king. Then the citizens went to the new king Rehoboam and said, “Your father put a heavy yoke on us, but now lighten the harsh labour and the heavy yoke and he put on us, and we will serve you.”

I get the impression Solomon forgot to groom his son for his role as king, because young king Rehoboam asked for three days time and then he would give them an answer.

First he asked his father’s elders, who counseled him to do as the people asked. Then he asked his own friends with whom he had grown up. They advised him to say, “My little finger is thicker than my father’s waist. My father laid on you a heavy yoke; I will make it even heavier. My father scourged you with whips; I will scourge you with scorpions.”

Young Rehoboam decided to go with the answer of his young rebel friends. That was not so smart. This heir king, in sharp contrast, was not as wise as his father, Solomon.

The Israelites went home, telling everyone, “We’re on our own. Rehoboam is not our king.” They called Jeroboam out of exile in Egypt to an assembly and made him their king.

It’s a bit tricky to keep these similar names sorted out. Rehoboam was the son of King Solomon. Jeroboam’s father was an official under Solomon and came from the village of Zeredah. As a young man Jeroboam had showed so much leadership ability that Solomon had hired him too, and put him in charge his fortifications and public works projects. He also was put in charge of the levy or taxes from the house of Joseph. When the people were disappointed in Rehoboam, (the regal) they turned to Jeroboam (the jealous) to fix things.

Jeroboam’s approach was to organize a larger rebellion, and let the people make him king over the larger portion, Israel.

Suddenly Rehoboam was only king over Jerusalem and it’s immediate area. He managed to muster the tribe of Benjamin and was making ready for war against Jeroboam and the rest of Israel when a man of God strongly advised them to go home and not fight against their brothers in Israel. So they went home.

I say hurrah for a man of God who urges against fighting our own kith and kin!

Jeroboam was not perfect either. He was afraid the people would go back to King Rehoboam, so he set up two golden calves and placed one in Bethel and one in Dan, so that the people would not go to Jerusalem to worship and there get to know Rehoboam and be drawn to his side. This back-fired on him when God sent a prophet to warn him that He was going to wipe out all his descendants, and this altar he was at would be split open and the ashes poured out as a confirmation.

This whole story has me thinking about the dangers of peer pressure. A young generation does not understand that the more experienced people will have more practical and solid advice. They follow their peers’ tastes, thoughts and example. They cannot imagine that the older people might have more wisdom.

Those of us “over the hill” have to admit that when we were in our teens and twenties we were very clever in our own eyes too. Nor were we willing to learn from our parents and grandparents. But that condemned us to learning from our own mistakes, repeating the wrongs the previous generations committed. How few from each generation learn instead from the one that went before.

Perhaps the whole moral of this story is for the youths who are tender of conscience and open to counsel from seniors. You will spare yourself so much trouble and heartache - even huge defeats - if you will hear out what your parents, grandparents and those of their generation have to tell you.

Whose advice do you seek out first? At any age we need to be careful and weigh the words of all our advisors against God’s Word, the ultimate in perfect counsel.

[Note: if you missed any articles in this series of article on Friendships in the Bible, and want to read them, you'll find them all linked from this index which is about Friendship]

Yes, my brother Ernie came on Saturday and he helped without complaining, and even did more than I had hoped for. We were both rather tired out, but I’m grateful for what was accomplished. I meant to add some more photos - the last installment - to the stairwell page, however, I’ve just realized that I left my camera at home. I can’t get access to the pictures I took on Saturday!

Ernie also brought along some jewelry that his wife Penny had prepared for me.

We had talked on the phone some weeks back, and she told me that she has taken up a new hobby, repairing jewelry chains and making necklaces. I had a handful of broken chains, and she urged me to send them to her. So I had. Now Ernie brought them back, plus some new ones that she had made for me. Again, I was going to show you these, but I forgot the camera in my purse as I walked to the office today.

You really don’t want to hear about our weather these days, do you? Or do you need a break from your own?

Saturday was quite mild, then the temperature plummeted for Sunday and yesterday. Today it is supposes to creep up again, and give us some milder days again. For us, mild can be still on the freezing side of -0 Celsius. It’s when the temperature drops to -20 to -30 and more that we wince and some are afraid to go outside.

On Sunday afternoon I walked to the hospital 9 blocks away, to see the mother of some friends from Hague, who is dying. I found the air growing sharper, and by late afternoon, when my friend Anna dropped by, the cold was beginning to creep into my house, so I had to turn up the thermostat.

When her son came to pick her up after 7 pm, it was truly COLD, and to top it off, the heater in his van was not working. They waited in my place for a while for someone else to bring another vehicle. Finally Gary and his buddy decided to ask me for a pail of hot water and a funnel to add to the radiator. After a while they figured it was safe to head home.

But hey, let’s cheer up. Someone told me in church that they have observed we are alternating weather each month. Sept was nice and summery. October was cold and had some snow. November was a lovely Indian summer. December was awfully cold. January has had some mild weeks, or weekends. February is stormy again, … so guess what’s coming in March! Yeah, it might be spring! Maybe where you are too!

Remember how I asked for online shopping tips last week? I haven’t received any from subscribers, but I did some research and found some on my own, and am moving forward with that web business plan. I used the SBI Brainstormer yesterday and was tickled to see that there is considerable potential for a profitable site, - if I use the best keywords.

I’m hoping Jondalar will start giving me lessons in creating videos this week. That should be interesting!

One problem I have is getting my emails answered so that there is some time left in an afternoon to check the STATs on all my sites and the ones I maintain for others. It seems that block of time is often interrupted, and sometimes snatched from me. One afternoon of doing something else, and not getting to my emails, means it will take an extra push and concentration for the next several days to catch up. It’s been like this since December, so when I do get to checking the STATs, it will not just be for the previous month, but the previous three in most cases.

Evenings? They are all spoken for, and I’m trying to squeeze in time to finish polishing up Betty’s Children-of-the-Heart.com site while she is not able to do anything about it.

A couple of weeks ago, I did manage to get another profile of a worthy mission up on the Generosity-Alive.org site, but have not had time to promote or link to that page from other sites yet. Pastor Duncan in Malawi runs the Searchlight Orphan Care and desperately needs $600 a month to keep feeding them. He’s run out of food and is afraid he’ll have to turn the kids out on the street. He’s hoping that my profile of their ministry will bring in funds. I wish I could guarantee that, but …I can’t twist people’s arms. Searchlight Orphan Care

Pastor Duncan strikes me as a sensible man who would really like to start some enterprise whereby the orphans could raise enough funds to run the place. I always am ready to help those who are not afraid of work.

Anybody have a small assembly or manufacturing business that could be done off-shore there? I wish I could send them a multi-interest entrepreneur with some managerial skills, and some knowledge of selling online. I’m sure they could be doing a number of profitable things.

Today’s article is about Solomon again, (The Queen of Sheba’s visit). You might even wonder if I deliberately planned it to come before Valentine’s day. No, it just happened.

The more research I’m doing in this area the more I am discovering that a really smart and frugal shopper - like me - is not truly smart and frugal until shopping online and able to find the best deals and even freebies of whatever you are looking for. I had no idea there were so many shopping portals - similar to MyPowerMall - and yet most of them are far more simple, AND FREE.

On top of that, there are lots of sites that scour the internet for the very best deals or coupon codes on anything that can be sold online. There is really no excuse any more for paying full price, on most things.

So far I have signed up for BigCrumbs.com and though I felt a bit tricked when I couldn’t explore Ebates.com until I gave an email address, which signed me up, I am seeing that it offers some good deals too. I have not really shopped at these places yet, so I can’t give you a review in that sense, but if you would like to go have a look, do go ahead.

I have found some others that list sites that give away freebies, but I think I should research those some more.

Sometimes people come into our lives for a while and basically check us out. Do they want us for a friend or not? At first they go by what they have heard about us, but these maybe-friends want to meet us and judge for themselves.

Often they will stand in the church foyer or your place of work and ask some questions and show themselves friendly. They may even give you something, or take you out for coffee or for lunch. Sometimes they even find a reason to come visit you at home.

It may not always be the rich Queen of Sheba that comes calling as was the case in King Solomon’s life, but studying her visit may be helpful to us.

This independently wealthy woman and government leader had heard down in Ethiopia, her own country, of the wealth and wisdom of King Solomon, and she came to check him out, her long retinue bearing gifts to give him.

Her gifts and praise must have impressed and tickled dear Sol, for he showed her all his own wealth and gave her rich presents too. It says in 1 Kings 10:13, “King Solomon gave the queen of Sheba all she desired and asked for, besides what he had given her out of his royal bounty. Then she left with her retinue to her own country.”

When someone gives us presents we tend to reciprocate, don’t we? The more we have the more or larger our gifts, right?

(Should we really give our friends everything they desire, or only if we can afford their desires? Or is there better wisdom in this regard?)

This particular Bible story doesn’t tell us exactly what we should do regarding gift-giving among friends, but it appears that Solomon was accustomed to receiving gifts. I Kings 10:25 says, “Year after year, everyone who came brought a gift - articles of silver and gold, robes, weapons and spices, and horses and mules.” Folks just knew to bring a gift if they were going to come into his presence. No wonder he became the richest man in the world.

That was all very exciting and pleasurable in the beginning, but later he wrote the books of Proverbs and Ecclesiastes and there he denounced the getting of wealth as vanity of vanities. It wasn’t a lasting, meaningful pleasure.

Many others have found this true. If we have friends just for the sake of the gifts they bring us, we will eventually find life meaningless as well. Lasting friendships that we will value and treasure in our hearts and memories must be based on more than gift exchanges.

So before we dash off – what is the answer? How should we deal with potential friends who are checking us out?

[Note: this is an extra long article. You can read the whole thing on this page;
When the Queen of Sheba Comes Calling

[Note: if you missed any articles in this series of article on Friendships in the Bible, and want to read them, you'll find them all linked from this index which is about Friendship]

Perhaps you get tuckered out just reading about my home reno projects? (Gulp! I just swallowed a desire to defend myself).

But if you want to know what goes on at my place when I’m home, this is the MAIN THING on most Saturdays. I know the seasons will change and then it will not be so possible. I spent a second Saturday on the stairwell project because a friend from the mission (WTM) agreed to come and help since he is tall and has long arms. I had hinted that I needed such a friend to help get the plaster out that I could not reach the previous Saturday.

Wayne Senger brought along his landlord, Jake, who had a weak arm from a recent accident, but they worked without complaining for about 2 and a half hours.

The plaster came out and when I asked about the slats they tackled that too! God bless them!

Wayne had worked a night shift at a warehouse and by 3:30 he really needed to go home to rest, but fortunately I could reach the lower slats that were left, and then I had to do the clean up. If this peaks your interest, I’ve added a few photos to last week’s photo story page; Stairwell-plaster-out!

After Ernie’s visit, I’ll be away at a genealogy workshop the next weekend, so it will be mid-February before I get back to my reno projects. I like to think that I may get the worst of the dirty jobs done by the end of March.

Yesterday a number of things came to a head at the office.

1. The data recovery I’d started for our Director here at WTM on Friday, finally finished. We had to put the hard drive from his bad laptop into my laptop (which often crashes), and then using a Knoppix CD, I was able to upload the files he wanted saved to one of my websites. From there I downloaded it to my main desktop computer. Tomorrow we will format and load his new laptop and add his old files that I recovered. Jondalar had already worked on this for two weeks, so this is quite a victory.

2. I got this next issue of Reflections ready to print, including some last minute corrections. This is the quarterly newsletter of which I am the layout editor and key writer.

3. In the morning I discovered that Ginny Dye has stopped - ended - MyPowerMall. I saw a video last week in which she hinted at this, so I wasn’t totally wiped off my feet, but I had been working on a new site that would drive a lot of traffic to MPM and that is now stopped in its tracks too. I should be able to shift gears, but I’m glad I haven’t lost more than a couple of months work on that. It was foundational though, to a huge dream I had of helping non-profits. I guess lots of people signed up but only a handful were really shopping online through the mall.

This means I’ll have to go through a lot of my sites to remove those MPM links. Hopefully I can find something else to replace them so I don’t have to go through those motions twice.

4. Last week I’d received a letter from Betty, a client, whose prolife website I was hosting. They had moved as a family to follow her husband to a new job. They are in a place in Mississippi where she can’t get phone or internet access. Her domain had gone down for lack of registration renewal. Since I couldn’t reach her any other way, I wrote to her, and yesterday she got to a phone and called me. We worked out a plan whereby I would register a similar domain name, and set up what I have as a backup to her site. I managed to get that done yesterday yet. The site still needs fine-tuning as some of the links don’t work, but if you had been looking for or linking to http://children-of-the-heart.net you need to change that now to http://Children-of-the-Heart.com (one that had not been available to her a few years ago when she first started her site).